CitiGurl123

When I was 12 we got the internet at my house. We only had AOL, our modem took 20 minutes to sign on and when anyone called- well, you remember...
I remember sitting in the phosphorescent glow of the screen, as brain cells slowly leaked out my ears, IMing 18 friends at once, the universal ping resounding in the living room like an alarm clock. Prrng. Pinnnng. Prrrng. Pinnng. My dad removed our speakers in less than a week...
But the single most internal joy was of course in creating your personal identity- your screen name! A small, usually completely inappropriate name tag the world would look at to make inaccurate assumptions about who you were, where you were from, how old you were and of course, how cute you might be. It had to be stellar, and different and not too long and speak volumes about your intellectual creativity so the entire freaking planet would know you were cool. It always ended up being something completely stupid.
I mean, seriously, who has kept the screen name they chose when they were 12? Or moreover still has an AOL account? Right, I mean right? Hasn't everyone moved on to Gmail and Earthlink and some-crap-that's-hard-to-remember.net? Yeah, about that...
Before you get all up-in-arms about my still having an AOL account- and yes, I literally still have the 12-year-old version of my digital self- let me just say a few things in my defense.
1. AOL is only 3 letters- It's easy to remember, and everyone knows it. I almost never have to spell my email address when I sign up for useless crap. Ok, maybe I thought I was being edgy when I spelled it CitiGurl- but come on, I was 12, and my middle name is spelled Kristyne- yeah, figure that one out.
2. 123 is actually my birthday. January 23rd, not December 3 in case you were wondering. Another thing that's easy to remember. I'll bet you thought I just chose 123 to add some fucking numbers didn't you? See, my 12 year-old-self was a smart bitch.
3. I've got about 4,526,324 email contacts already saved to Citigurl123's mailing list. And don't say, well you could transfer those names- because this is already becoming way too much work.
4. You guys all change your emails so often that I literally have no idea what any of your addresses are anymore. All I can remember are your AOL account screen names...
5. Some total asshole already took Jennie.Hurd@Gmail.com- seriously? WTF? How many of me are there in this world? Obviously, at least one too many.

Citigurl123@aol.com.
It's for realz, but don't email me... I never check my emails...